Posts Tagged ‘single parent’

Single Parents: Be -Easy- On Yourselves #SingleParentJoy

Single parents- be easy on yourselves

When I look in the mirror, I often don’t like what I see.

With ease I count my many imperfections. My flaws that make me uncomfortably vulnerable. I am my harshest critic and loudest cheerleader, but at times being a solo parent scares me…. a lot a lot. Can I do this?? I ask myself this at least once a day. The worry, the anxiety, the fear, the loneliness and joy that come with being a single parent are equally exhilarating and nerve-wracking. I have to constantly remind myself that it is my choice every single day to either allow myself to be victim to my vulnerabilities or face them head on with shaky hands. When I look at my daughter, when I see how her smile lights up the room I am reminded that maybe I don’t need to worry so much. She’s more than ok. She’s great. She’s a carefully crafted masterpiece and I am lucky to experience her joy and warmth on a daily basis.

When I doubt myself, which I often do, I have a hard time finding the good within my worries. I focus only on what I consider are imperfections but I’m learning that when I take are step back they aren’t imperfections at all. They are lessons. Lessons that must be learned.

I am the creator of my inner peace or inner turmoil. It’s up to me to decide who I will be. And I choose today and everyday regardless of my worries to rise above and see through my imperfections to the perfectly imperfect woman and mother I am growing to be.

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It has been a difficult journey to cut myself some slack and allow myself the ability to make mistakes. They don’t define me. How I move past them does.

Be easy on yourselves single parents, it sure isn’t easy, but damn it’s worth it.



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Join me this March to Celebrate Single Parents #SingleParentJoy

Join me this March for Single Parent Awareness Month (1)

Through this blog I’ve been able to share my deepest and darkest fears, my triumphs and all the stumbles and successes along the way. Vulnerability has been challenging. Yet, necessary for growth. I’ve opened up my life, my story, my heart as a means to create community. To remind one another that we’re not alone, because I’ve faced many days feeling as if I was.

I became a mother 10 years ago.

I became a single parent almost 9 years ago.

My life has never been the same since I first saw my 6lb 14oz daughter’s black hair and wrinkled skin. And I wouldn’t change a thing. If you follow me on Instagram, Facebook, or Twitter you may have noticed a new movement I’ve created: Single Parent Awareness Month. I had no idea that March 21 was Single Parent Awareness day – but I said a day? No, no. That won’t work. So for the month of March please follow along for inspiration, stories and most importantly EMPOWERMENT for single parents who are often isolated and judged.

Join me this March to Celebrate Single Parents #SingleParentJoy from Alexandra Elizabeth on Vimeo.

I could think of no better way to introduce this movement to you than a vlog. I spent hours teaching myself Adobe Premiere to edit this video – it’s not perfect and of course the little one is clearing her throat in the background. But it’s real. It’s my story. I share the most pivotal moment in my motherhood journey – my daughter’s birth story and then my journey into coparenting and why I wanted to start this movement – this tribe.

Single moms and single dads….you are enough. You are not alone. I know it can be tough and frustrating, so let’s support one another. Let’s be each other’s tribe.

If you’re ready to join me please follow along on social media and use the hashtag #SingleParentJoy. It’s not meant to insinuate single parenthood is an angelic journey. But the reward? The joy of watching your child grow and learn and become their own person. Now that’s something to celebrate.

Please reach out if you’re a single parent and would like to partner – I’m always looking to connect with other single parents to enact real change. Because I believe when we empower a single parent, we can change the world? And if you’re one of my awesome readers who isn’t a single parent, betcha know one – so please send them my way :)

Are you with me?



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[Co-Parenting Matters] Talking To Your Child About Your Ex

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As much as I have grown thorough my experience co-parenting over the past six years there are still much for me to learn.

I admit, I can be quite stubborn and there are certain things I will not budge on, and this causes severe tension between my co-parent and I. It’s fair to  say I hold quite a bit of anger towards him, which is quite unhealthy and has affected both my personal and professional life. Most importantly it’s affected how I communicate about him with our daughter.

I have the ferocity and strength of a mama bear protecting her cub when it comes to my daughter. And over the years I’ve felt the need to protect her…from her own father. Her little heart can only take so many letdowns and she shouldn’t cry over him and his broken promises. I internalize all of how she feels, and at times I feel like a ball of rage. At times feeling absolutely unable to console her or to make our overall situation any better.

When she talked about him, my body language changed, my eyes shifted and became just slivers. There was no conversation, she would talk and I would listen. But not really. One night while home watching the child he and I made sleep the night away, I wept. I wept for the man he wasn’t. I wept for her sorrows. I wept that I couldn’t protect her.

Read the remainder of my post over of The Young Mommy Life.



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