Posts Tagged ‘image’

Join The #KeepItReal 3 Day Challenge!

As a woman, and mother I’ve struggled with my perception of myself and my body. I don’t have to tell you how having a child can change your body, and I have a different relationship with my body since giving birth six years ago. Yeah, I’m a little more self-conscious, and get pretty jealous of the celebrity moms rocking it in their 2 pieces in the magazine. Didn’t they have stretch marks I say? Didn’t their boobs sag afterwards? It’s so strange all throughout my pregnancy my stomach was so smooth, and as soon as I had Lil Mama my stomach told a different story. And let’s not even talk about the boobs!

What is frustrating as a woman and mother to a daughter is how the media portrays beauty. What girls see, what I see is not the reality. There is a perception that beauty should be and is flawless perfection. Eyebrows should be perfectly arched, liner precisely drawn, and beautiful voluptuous curves. These images are splashed in magazines, and in my opinion sharing the wrong image to women and girls about what real beauty is.

The 3 day #KeepItReal concept is amazing. We’re challenges mags to KEEP IT REAL and take the focus off this impractical idea of beauty so girls can have a fun and stress-free summer! So instead of feeling guilty that you can’t fit into the designer 2 piece bikini featured in the latest gossip mag, we are putting pressure on the mags that have such unrealistic views of beauty. The goal of the 3 days is to ask magazines one very reasonable request: to post at least one unphotoshopped image of a model per issue.

How can you get involved? First, download the Keep It Real Toolkit which includes more information and contact info of Magazine Editors we’ll target.

Day One (June 27) was all about tweeting using the #KeepItReal hashtag tweeting to magazines to KEEP IT REAL! I tweeted out to Self Mag & Essence!

Day Two (June 28) is about spreading the #KeepItReal word through blog posts and Facebook, and sharing post url’s to magazines via twitter! Post your own blog or feel free to share this post!

Day Three (June 29) is about capturing real beauty. Get on Instagram and share the image to the left using #KeepItRealChallenge and show the world what REAL beauty looks like to you!! Share the picture via FB and Twitter using the #KeepItReal hashtag! In partnership with Endangered Bodies they’ll be taking the best photo of the day and display it on a billboard in NYC!

Interested? I encourage you to get involved! You can RSVP via their Facebook Event Page. I am committed to helping change the way my daughter grows up and views beauty via these publications. I’ve already got my pictures ready to share via Instagram (follow me: msalexandrav), twitter, and facebook and am excited to be part of this necessary movement!

#KeepItReal !!



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How to Talk to Little Girls

A friend of mine, who is a mother of 2 daughters, forwarded me this article titled How to Talk to Little Girls featured in The Huffington Post. The article by Lisa Bloom talks about girls & self image and how we as parents and adults play into girl’s self-esteem. Think for a second about your encounters with girls, do you comment on their hair or outfit? Are you quick to tell them how cute they are? (slumps down in seat).
Lisa says, “Teaching girls that their appearance is the first thing you notice tells them that looks are more important than anything. It sets them up for dieting at age 5 and foundation at age 11 and boob jobs at 17 and Botox at 23. As our cultural imperative for girls to be hot 24/7 has become the new normal”
Not good!! The article was enlightening to me; it made me take a hard look at how I interact with my own daughter as well as little girls I come across. I realize that I often comment little girls on their new haircut or sparkly tights. And while I never saw anything wrong with it, I am becoming more aware of how these constant comments can affect a girl’s self-esteem and expectations.
My friend Marlene who forwarded me the article had this to say after reading:
“It really opened my eyes to how I interact with my girls and other young children their age. I mean I am definitely one of those people that use compliments as an ice breaker with kids like “wow, you look beautiful in that dress” and even with boys “he look so handsome in that outfit” etc. And I also thought showering my girls with compliments like these would build their self confidence, but it’s actually counter-productive because now thinking back I can recall instances where my own daughter would get dressed and ask ‘Mom, do I look pretty in this dress?, Does my hair look nice like this?’ I always say of course you look great no matter what…..BUT now I realize that she was seeking my approval. I want my girls’ self confidence to be based on who they are and what they know and not how they look. I guess all we can do I acknowledge this and try to break the cycle. At least I do.”
This article made me think of a previous post of mine titled Does this diaper make my butt look big. In the article I talked about the poison that are Bratz dolls and how more and more kids are concerned with their image, when they should just be concerned about being kids! Raising a healthy and confident daughter is extremely important to me, and I know that in order to achieve this it takes a lot of patience and conversations with her. Though it seems that society is completely against my desires, promoting the complete opposite of role-models and putting so much pressure onto image.
Did you read the article by Lisa Bloom? How do you counteract society’s fascination with image when interacting with your own daughter or girls you may know? 


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A Life full of Plan B’s

Plan A: Graduate from College #1

Plan B: Graduate from College #3

Plan A: Keep my job throughout my pregnancy

Plan B:  Fired not even 1/2 way through my pregnancy

Plan A: Sexy sleek black small SUV…fully loaded

Plan B: 1996Toyota Camry

Plan A: First apartment = Complete Awesomeness

Plan B: First apartment=1 bedroom hole in the wall

Plan A: SuperMom

Plan B: Often annoyed aggravated- due- to –lack- of- sleep Mom

Plan A: Together Forever with my daughter’s father

Plan B: Try to have a mature understanding for the sake of our daughter

Plan A: Single life, no kids, gorgeous loft apartment, fly car, hott bod

Plan B: Kid at 19, ok apartment, crappy car, and not so hott bod

Plan A: Perfect Family = Mom, Dad, Kids

Plan B: Family = Mom + Daughter

 

Let’s be honest, it can be downright annoying when things don’t go as planned! We plan, we schedule, we’ve got everything in a little box, have tied a ribbon, and then someone comes along and opens it and throws the stuff around. Annoying! But…not the end of the world!

My life has been all about Plan Bs. I’ve always had an idea of how I wanted to do things and where I wanted my life to go. Then BAM! Life instantly changes, and all I can do to try to find my balance with the new changes. And as soon as I get some

stability and create new visions for my future BAM, this roller coaster of a life heads down around and to the side and I once again have to find my ground. Funny how life has a way of constantly changing. And yet, change is one of the things I fear.

What I have yet to fully understand, is that these Plan Bs are not Plan Bs…they are what was meant to be for my life. All that has happened, all the pain I have gone through, all the bs I had to deal with, all the people I have met along the way…it’s all happened for a reason and has brought me to the place I am today. If I never would have given my daughter’s father my number, I would never been able to meet my beautiful beautiful daughter.

So I’ll still create visions for my futures, but recognize that what will be, will be.

And all I can do is prepare myself for the journey.



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