Posts Tagged ‘family’

Single Parents: Be -Easy- On Yourselves #SingleParentJoy

Single parents- be easy on yourselves

When I look in the mirror, I often don’t like what I see.

With ease I count my many imperfections. My flaws that make me uncomfortably vulnerable. I am my harshest critic and loudest cheerleader, but at times being a solo parent scares me…. a lot a lot. Can I do this?? I ask myself this at least once a day. The worry, the anxiety, the fear, the loneliness and joy that come with being a single parent are equally exhilarating and nerve-wracking. I have to constantly remind myself that it is my choice every single day to either allow myself to be victim to my vulnerabilities or face them head on with shaky hands. When I look at my daughter, when I see how her smile lights up the room I am reminded that maybe I don’t need to worry so much. She’s more than ok. She’s great. She’s a carefully crafted masterpiece and I am lucky to experience her joy and warmth on a daily basis.

When I doubt myself, which I often do, I have a hard time finding the good within my worries. I focus only on what I consider are imperfections but I’m learning that when I take are step back they aren’t imperfections at all. They are lessons. Lessons that must be learned.

I am the creator of inner peace or inner turmoil. It’s up to me to decide who I will be. And I choose today and everyday regardless of my worries to rise above and see through my imperfections to the perfectly imperfect woman and mother I am growing to be.

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It has been a difficult journey to cut myself some slack and allow myself the ability to make mistakes. They don’t define me. How I move past them does.

Be easy on yourselves single parents, it sure isn’t easy, but damn it’s worth it.



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Review: ANNIE The Musical in Boston

Disclosure: I received a four pack of tickets to attend Annie. All opinions – as always are my own.

This past Wednesday our family was invited to the opening night of ANNIE The Musical at the Citi Performing Arts Center Wang Theatre in Boston. Along with my sister and niece we waited anxiously for Annie and Oliver Warbucks to arrive for the red carpet. And oh – they arrived in style!

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Little Annie was played by 9 year old Issie Swickle – and as soon as she got out the car she was a ray of sunshine and generously signed playbills for eager kids including my own!

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I mean who doesn’t love Annie? It’s a great show, with incredible music and a great ending. Watching the movie that we love so much come to life on stage was a special experience. The group of orphans were animated and dynamic and a lot of fun. Miss Hannigan played by Lynn Andrews was my favorite character in the musical! She brought her own sass and humor to the musical that I know the adults really enjoyed!

After we left the show my daughter pulled me aside and asked me if there were any singing or dancing camps she could attend next summer. She was taken by the coordination and enthusiasm of the kids in the show and it only fueled her desire to one day (sooner than later) hit the big stage!

Be sure to catch ANNIE while the show is in Boston which is until November 16, 2014! Directed by original lyricist and director Martin Charnin and choreographed by Liza Gennaro, this production of ANNIE is a brand new incarnation of the iconic original. Featuring book and score by Tony Award®-winners Thomas Meehan, Charles Strouse and Martin Charnin, ANNIE includes such unforgettable songs as “It’s the Hard Knock Life,” “Easy Street,” “I Don’t Need Anything But You,” plus the eternal anthem of optimism, “Tomorrow.”

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You can catch the show Tuesday through Saturday evenings at 7:00 pm; matinees on Thursday, November 6 at 11:00 am, Tuesday, November 11 at 2:00 pm, and Saturdays at 2:00 pm; and Sundays at 1:00 pm and 6:00 pm. Tickets are priced at $35.00 – $125.00; all prices include a $3.75 facility fee per ticket.  Tickets are now on sale at the Citi Center box office, through www.citicenter.org or by calling 800-982-ARTS (2787), or through Ticketmaster. Groups of 10 or more may reserve tickets now by contacting Citi Performing Arts Center Group Sales at (617) 532-1116 or groups@citicenter.org.

Will you be attending Annie in Boston?



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An Open Letter To My Mother

This is the follow-up to the essay I wrote last week. In it, I come to grips with childhood trauma and searched for answers in my mother’s actions. Read that essay if you haven’t yet, then come back and read this. 

 

Dear Mom,

I’ve begun writing this too many times to remember. I’m angry. I’m upset. I’m sad. I’m disappointed. I’m trying to make sense of so much, Mom, of our broken family, of you being emotionally absent for me and my siblings, to you prioritizing a piece of scum over your children.

What man would talk down to a woman and verbally assault her in front of her children? And what mother would allow that to happen and scold her children if they tried to protect her? Do you know that I refuse to celebrate my birthday, and it’s not because Grandpa passed away on my birthday years ago. It’s because you never prioritized my birthday, one year you simply left an outfit on my bed and left a note stating you’d be at his house for the night. I spent the whole night crying, Mom. There is no reason my oldest sister, who for reasons you refuse to take responsibility for, had to raise me and my siblings. You were the mother, you were the parent. But you weren’t there.

I’m sure I should be in therapy. Everyone thinks I’m so put together. I do what I have to do for my family, but I’m a mess and for the longest time I refused to work through the negative feelings of my childhood. Do you know I have almost no recollection of my childhood before age 11 except a few moments that stand out. The time you flung me across the room because I asked a friend’s parent for ice cream money. Or what about one of the many times you were beating me and I cried out my brother’s name. That was my childhood, Mom – that is what I remember. The affects of living with an emotionally absent and depressed woman is that I now have severe issues with communication with friends and in my relationships. I withdraw and I shut people out – for awhile I got scared because I worried I was going to end up like you. Miserable and manically depressed.

While I can’t imagine being given up for adoption as a newborn as you were, I do know what abandonment feels like. You abandoned us – you abandoned me. For someone who wanted a big family so bad, you sure didn’t treat us like you wanted us.

Read the rest of “An Open Letter To My Mother” over on The Young Mommy Life. 



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