Archive for the ‘Dating’ Category

[Learning To Let Go] Removing Yourself from Unhealthy Relationships


Even though I’d rather forget, I still remember my first unhealthy and toxic relationship. I fell in love at summer camp. I was 15. In between long days of activities with campers he and I would exchange glances and smiles at the lake or during dinner. It wasn’t long before he asked me out.

The first time he yelled at me I freaked out.

The first time he pushed me I wondered what I did wrong.

I spent the majority of that summer catering to someone who didn’t view me as special. He held no place for me in his heart, but told me he loved me. I allowed myself to be manipulated, I allowed him to treat me like just someone. It’s no surprise we never talked again after that summer.

That relationship started a pattern of engaging in unhealthy relationships. I blamed it on not having a father around; I needed a man around to love me, because I didn’t feel it at home. I felt incredibly stuck in my small town. I had no supervision and I craved something more. Something tangible, something that could fill my heart up. I didn’t want to feel empty anymore. You’d think after that summer of love I would have learned my lesson, I would have thought more of myself than to get involved with men who just tossed me aside. I only knew my daughter’s father a couple of months before I became pregnant.

I’m a lover—as much as it hurts, I give love a chance over and over. It’s a risk, but I can’t help it. The rush, the excitement, the acceptance – I crave it. I need it. I’ve been searching for something, and in the process I’ve gotten my heart stepped on and tossed aside. Sometimes I wonder if it still beats.

Most recently I entertained someone who I wasn’t planning on inviting into my heart. But his smile…it got me. What started out as innocent flirting quickly developed into something more, something passionate, and I didn’t want to stop the roller coaster ride. I was used to the uncertainness and feeling unfulfilled, so his unwillingness to take our situation to the next level only heightened my desire for him.

When he told me he loved me I was in shock – his actions didn’t support it, but I was ecstatic hoping finally we could move forward together. I became slightly obsessed with our unhealthy relationship – we went through some hard times and he wasn’t there to support me. It didn’t seem like he cared that I was hurting. He said he did, but where was he when things got rough? This destructive pattern continued, my friends saw how miserable I was, told me I deserved better. But I didn’t think so. I felt like I got exactly what I deserved.

Read the rest of  [Learning To Let Go] Removing Yourself from Unhealthy Relationships over on The Young Mommy Life.


Single Mom Not Seeking this Valentine’s Day

Please let me preface this post by saying I am not a bitter man-hating woman, I don’t curse happy couples on V-Day. I was not recently burned and looking for revenge. I’m just a woman and mom giving her two sense in on 2.14.

It’s cute. From the freshly trimmed bouquets of flowers, to neatly wrapped boxes of chocolate, to plush singing teddy bears, to mushy cards, Valentine’s Day is truly a cutesy day. Supposed to be a day where lovers unite to rekindle their love over expensive dinners and bottles of wine. Where lovers who have gone astray once again remember the love they shared. A chance to spoil your Valentine and show them how much they mean to you. It all sounds GREAT, doesn’t it? It sure does! But, not for this single mama.

Regardless of if I’ve been in a relationship or not, 2/14 has never been my cup of tea, or box of chocolates (haha). I’ve never been able to fully wrap my head around a day dedicated to showing love and affection to those that live within your heart. Just like with Mother’s Day and Father’s Day I’m a big believer in consistently letting people in your life know you care about them, at every opportunity you get. Maybe this stems from my not being as affectionate with my Grandfather as I wanted to be before he passed. But this day full of drawn out love songs and pink and red hearts kind of just gets on my nerves, as a woman and single mama.

Yes, I’m a single mama, and damn proud of the life I’m building for myself and my daughter. But, riddle me this, why do some think that because I don’t depend on a man, live with a man, have a man on my arm, mean that I MUST be unhappy and bitter and lonely. It MUST mean that I’m on the prowl desperately searching for some arm candy to open the door, buy me dinner, and some chocolate covered strawberries?

In the words of my new friend via YouTube, Sweet Brown:

Do I want to eventually a forever kind of love? A partner to romance and share life’s beautiful memories with? A loving father and husband to grow old with? Hell-to-the-yes!! TRUE LOVE is a beautiful beautiful thing!! However, as a woman with dignity, I refuse to be sucked into believing that because I am single and not seeking on Valentine’s Day means that I’ve got my priorities all messed up and backwards.

So Valentine’s Day, you can keep your sweetheart candies, red artificial lollipops, and overpriced Valentine’s cards. This single mom is happily not seeking this year, and is oh so very content with me, myself, and I!


Ashton Kutcher’s NEW dating video. Have you seen it?? #ashtondatingvideo

I’m not one to gossip, but I’m sure most of us have heard about Ashton Kutcher & Demi Moore’s breakup. Breakups are never easy, but  have you guys seen this? It looks like Ashton is putting himself out there with this new dating video. He’s looking for love. Again.

Ashton sure does deliver some laughs with his video on the new dating site for World Wide Lovers

With the help of an Academy Award-winning make-up and hair team, Ashton Kutcher has been transformed into four very different and colorful characters: a flamboyant fashion designer, a sensitive Harley-loving biker, a new age hippie and a Bollywood director.  Together, along with Ashton Kutcher, they are all in search of love which will appear in a series of YouTube videos.

– Darl is the over the top, vain diva.  He shares what he’s looking for by telling us what makes him so special.  And he loves his dog, Pupu.

– Nigel is the introspective hippie who tells us what he is looking for with his deep thoughts and wisdom.

– Swordfish is the sweet, lovable biker who tells his stories through his tattoos and his life on the road.

– Raj is the happiest guy on Earth.  He is looking for love based on his knowledge of pop culture and his glowing optimism.

Each of Ashton’s characters are searching for their own true love, and discover at the end of the video a particular snack flavor that matches their desires.

Have to say I never thought I’d see the day when Mr. Kutcher would need a dating video, but hey finding love is hard. And I shouldn’t be too surprised because the new claim is that one in five relationships start online. Good luck Ashton!!

Disclaimer: This is a sponsored post by Popchips. All thoughts and opinions are those of mine alone.